Anxiety can often feel overwhelming and all-consuming. If this resonates with you, perhaps you could really benefit from learning some practical ways to manage your anxiety. When anxiety hits, here are 3 quick tips that I’ve found helpful along the way, and I hope you will too.

#1   Movement and Breath.

These are two of anxiety’s greatest enemies. Anxiety is an emotion that we typically carry in very specific parts of our bodies. For some, anxiety feels like an accelerated heartbeat or an annoying cramp in the neck. For others, their jaw gets clenched and their test tightens up. Many of us become so used to carrying anxiety in our bodies, we are not even aware of our rapid breaths or tense shoulders until it’s brought to our attention. Breathing and movement tell those muscles, “You don’t have to hold this all inside. Let’s let a little bit of this go.”  As you’re reading this, try taking one big inhale through your nose as you count to 4 with me. Hold that breath for 7 seconds. Then take a deep exhale through your mouth for 8 seconds. Feel free to do that a few more times. Now humor me for a moment and roll your shoulders back as you read this, and move your mouth around to unclench your jaw. What do you notice? Were you carrying tension in those parts of your body? While many of us might not have the luxury of attending a rejuvenating yoga class or a 45-minute hike everyday, making even small movement and breathing exercises a part of your daily routine can make a significant impact – even if that is only for 2 minutes. Start small, and slowly begin to notice how your body is impacted by these practices.

#2   Set a timer for 60 seconds and write down every negative thought or worry on your mind.

Once you’ve done so, take a few moments to read through this list. Now circle which worry/concern you have control over the outcome (ie. finishing a homework assignment or needing to make dinner tonight). For the negative thoughts that you did not circle, this means these worries are outside of your control. This might be concerns about a loved one’s health or hearing back from a job interview. Give yourself permission to take a temporary break from thinking about those worries, even if just for the next 5 minutes. Now – were you able to circle any? If so, brainstorm some tangible next steps to tackle these stressors. Perhaps that means writing a schedule or to-do list for the rest of this day. Oftentimes anxiety can feel like an overwhelming fog with no way out. That fog can begin to feel less overwhelming when we create small action steps and a clear game plan.

#3   Make a mental list of your support system.

As you’re reading this blog post, who are 1-3 people that you can identify as supports in your life? Support for YOU. It could be a spouse, a neighbor, your best friend of 20 years, your own parent. This list doesn’t need to be long, however you do need someone in your life who is a source of comfort and encouragement for you. With how fast-paced many of our lives are, life can easily become very isolated – and how much more is that magnified during a global pandemic. Once you’ve identified your people, make it a priority this week to connect with them. Whether that’s a simple text right this moment or a phone call, give yourself the opportunity this week to allow someone else to support you. Perhaps schedule in your phone calendar an “appointment” this week to call that person. A good friend can be a source of joy and encouragement amidst your anxiety. 

Can’t identify anyone in your life that feels like a genuine support for you? I’ve worked with many people who would agree with you. It’s a painful reality to not have anyone in your life that you can confidently rely on for validation, friendship or guidance. This is one reason many people will seek out therapy – for support. Perhaps therapy could be a helpful place for you to begin to feel less alone and more supported. If anxiety figuratively weighs 30lbs, how much easier would it be to carry that weight between 2 people instead of just 1? Therapy is not a one-time fix for anxiety, however I have seen it serve as a space for men and women to know they’re not alone and to begin to gain confidence over their anxiety.

When we can validate our own pain, we are more likely to validate/have empathy for other people’s pain – including our partners, our children, our coworkers and our friends. Anxiety is real. Try reaching out to a friend this week and perhaps start each day with 5 deep breaths before jumping full-force into the hustle and bustle of your day. Or it might be time to seek out a therapist as well. If you find that your anxiety has become unmanageable and could use additional support, you can call our office at 720-489-8555 to find a counselor that can help. May you know this week that your body and mind are worth paying attention to. And may you know that anxiety doesn’t have to have the final word.

Nikki Randall, M.A., MFTC is a Marriage and Family Therapist Candidate who enjoys working with teens and adults to overcome anxiety. Contact her or the front desk to request an appointment!