In my first blog in this series, we took a look at the signs and symptoms of Compassion Fatigue. This has become a growing problem as we approach the year mark of a global pandemic. You may be a helper or caregiver by profession, or you may find yourself in this role because of life circumstances. There are ways to recover from compassion fatigue and prevent it so that you can continue doing the work or service that you love.

In the last blog, we introduced the analogy of the cup. The cost of caring is that it drains your cup quickly, or it can be difficult to get your cup filled back up again. Recovering from compassion fatigue involves repairing the holes in your cup, finding ways to fill your cup, and then remembering that what you give to others is an overflow from your full cup, rather than a pouring out. Speaking with a professional counselor can help you in these areas. 

Here are some practical ways that counseling can help with compassion fatigue:

  • Provide a safe place to talk

    • Speaking with a counselor can give you the freedom and safety to verbalize and process the traumatic experiences you have witnessed as a helper or caregiver. A counselor can help you normalize terrible thoughts that you feel guilty for thinking 

  • Build social supports

    • One key to fighting compassion fatigue is to have social supports around you. You may not be able to tell a spouse or friend all of the details of the people that you help, but it is still important to build encouraging, positive relationships who can support you during difficult days

  • Boundary setting and maintaining

    • A counselor can help you learn what your boundaries are and how to implement them in your life to improve your work and life balance. As a helper, you might find it difficult to say “no”. Maintaining boundaries will help you to realize that it is okay to say “no”, and that saying “no” actually frees you up to say “yes” to other meaningful and life-giving experiences. Boundary setting also allows a person to learn to express their feelings and ask for what they need.

  • Increase empathy 

    • As compassion fatigue sets in, it becomes more difficult to empathize with the person you are caring for or helping. Working with a counselor can help you to understand other perspectives and to increase empathy so that you can continue providing quality care in your work. Part of empathizing with a person who can be difficult to care for is to understand that behavior is purposeful. The person might not be trying to be difficult, but they are acting in a certain way because they are trying to express a need. Increasing empathy can help you to understand the underlying need behind the behavior. 

  • Self-care and skills building

    • A counselor can help you brainstorm new ideas for self-care and help you learn how to make self-care a priority. You can also learn skills for stress management, mindfulness, and calming meditations. 

These skills and strategies are what can patch the holes in your cup. At different times in your life you might find that new holes are created, or that your cup starts tipping into a pouring out motion again. When this starts happening, remember that there are ways to prevent this and skills to use to overcome the fatigue. Your cup can be filled to the point of overflowing. Then, you will reclaim that beautiful sense of purpose and piece of your identity that comes from being able to help others. This helping will not come from obligation or duty, but out of true love and compassion.

Take a moment to think, what are the holes in your cup that need your attention and repair? Then consider what are the ways that you can fill your cup?

 

Danica Hungerford is a Licensed Professional Counselor Candidate with experience as a caregiver in many settings. She is passionate about helping the helpers and has openings for in person or online sessions. Contact her or the front desk to request an appointment!